@Puck.

tansanalopez:

Santana felt the burning of suppressed cries tickling her throat and the stinging at the back of her eyes that threatened to spill tears. Clenching her jaw against it all she determinedly stared at him, willing herself not to cry. Santana didn’t cry. Not unless there was something in it for her, not unless she could give herself an advantage to get something. She clasped her fingers together nervously, already feeling herself pull away from him; suddenly feeling dirty and feral or wrong under his stare. 

The answer was already on her lips, twisting like poison in its own truth and honesty. “No sé,” she mumbled under her breath, her brown eyes looking at him glassily. “To feel something?” she said finally, her brows raised somewhat since the both of them wouldn’t even be in the position they currently were if they weren’t both so desperately in need of using each others bodies like a drug. Like addicts coming back for more, for another high in order to just feel for at least a few hours. 

Santana honestly couldn’t remember how long she’d been doing it, in some respects it felt like she’d been abusing herself and her body for years, for as long as she could remember. Starving it, working it to the bone to be leaner, tauter and more desirable, abusing sex and deadening her insides with booze and vicious words shot at other people. “To feel anything besides a toy or second-best,” she said tragically, rolling her eyes at herself. Maybe it’d been a mistake. And maybe lashing out again wasn’t the smartest choice and sure, maybe he did really care for her. Kind of like Brittany. Enough, but not as much as someone else. Quinn … Artie. And then there was Santana; just a fucking joke. A lay. Someone to fuck, fuck with or fuck over but never someone to love or make love with. 

Pushing off him suddenly, finally cutting the magnetic tie that had pulled their gazes together, Santana moved to find the rest of her discarded clothes and picked up a silk robe nearby to cover herself with, hugging herself in the process, comforting herself by herself as usual.

Puck stared at the space where she was sitting before she moved in a haze. He didn’t know where this new information came from, why she was only deciding to tell him now, why she would even do such a thing to herself. A second choice? Who would put Santana second? She got a lot of attention at school, it was almost a mystery as to why she was still single. That and, she used her mean yet sexy charm to get anything she wanted. That’s why she was pretty much second in command to Quinn. Puck’s mouth fell open just a little when he realized. Second in command to Quinn. People picking Quinn over her, would be one of the reasons.

He stood up, marching over to Santana and enveloped her in what he liked to call a bear hug. The same type of hug he gave Schuester before they performed at nationals. The only difference this time was, he wasn’t smiling. His lips were drawn out in a straight line with no emotion on his face. If he could see himself, he would notice just how pale his face was. All of the color had drained from his face like it was suctioned out, even his eyes were dark and hollow. Someone who he was so close to in his life had purposefully hurt themselves, practically under his nose.

He held her there, one arm wrapped around her back while the other one came up and held her head in place, forcing her against him. Whether if she returned the hug or not, he didn’t care. He wanted to comfort her and let her know that he was her, and he would punch the next person who put her second to anybody. He would make sure she stopped hurting herself, that she stopped abusing herself in any shape or form. Until she was happy, he would put her first. It was partially his fault, especially what happened before between himself, Quinn and her. That wouldn’t have solved anything. He owed her this much, at least. He would put the blame on him for quite a while, if not, forever. “Not anymore, okay? Not anymore. I’m here.” he choked out against the side of her cheek.

1. tansanalopez reblogged this from puckpuckpuck and added:

   the sudden revelation, rolling...eyes and scoffing in that disgusted way at

2. puckpuckpuck reblogged this from tansanalopez and added:

   bedroom with an uneasy feeling in...he supposed to go home, pack, find his passport

3. tansanalopez reblogged this from puckpuckpuck and added:

   Santana remained largely quiet through his response and...silently instead busied herself...

4. puckpuckpuck reblogged this from tansanalopez and added:

   Puck allowed himself to relax into...while appreciating

5. tansanalopez reblogged this from puckpuckpuck and added:

   She sighed again...eyes fall like curtains across her bloodshot eyes, blacking out the...

6. puckpuckpuck reblogged this from tansanalopez and added:

   Puck raised his eyebrows questioningly and stared at her intently. Girls emotions, especially Santana’s and Quinn - only...

7. tansanalopez reblogged this from puckpuckpuck and added:

   Well you were wrong. I...never okay. She thought...feeble...

8. puckpuckpuck reblogged this from tansanalopez and added:

   Puck was stunned...silence, choosing to keep...stay safe....

9. tansanalopez reblogged this from puckpuckpuck and added:

   “Yeah and looks where that’s gotten me,”...fired back, quickly moving to chuck his...

10. puckpuckpuck reblogged this from tansanalopez and added:

    “Why wouldn’t I care?” Puck asked, taking...cold after she pulled away, mainly because he...

11. tansanalopez reblogged this from puckpuckpuck and added:

    bit, stunned into a dumb silence with her small hands pressing...his abs and warm body...

12. puckpuckpuck reblogged this from tansanalopez and added:

    a haze. He didn’t know where this new information came from, why...was only deciding to...

13. tansanalopez reblogged this from puckpuckpuck and added:

    Santana felt the burning of suppressed cries tickling her throat and the stinging at the back of her eyes that...

14. puckpuckpuck reblogged this from tansanalopez and added:

    Puck’s jaw tightened at...words, especially since he found this anything but funny. He...

15. tansanalopez reblogged this from puckpuckpuck and added:

    Santana twisted her lips, setting them into a hardened straight line,...warm brown...

16. puckpuckpuck reblogged this from tansanalopez and added:

    Puck thought when she led...thigh, it would be for...lot...

17. tansanalopez reblogged this from puckpuckpuck and added:

    the soft whimper...dared to bubble up...her throat,...

18. puckpuckpuck reblogged this from tansanalopez and added:

    Puck picked up on...increasing pace with equal short thrusts upwards, feeling that same...

19. tansanalopez reblogged this from puckpuckpuck and added:

    She shivered into him...felt herself tightening...squeezing...

20. puckpuckpuck reblogged this from tansanalopez and added:

    slow rhythm, going with the slow pace...Santana wanted. Their mouths connected, slowly,...

21. tansanalopez reblogged this from puckpuckpuck and added:

    second time that night, Puck managed...piss her off and pleasure her between a span of a...

22. puckpuckpuck reblogged this from tansanalopez and added:

    A low and deep growl escaped past his throat at...way she was teasing him, like she knew...

23. tansanalopez reblogged this from puckpuckpuck and added:

    seduction shadowing over...face again, Santana slowly leaned into him towards the condom....

24. puckpuckpuck reblogged this from tansanalopez and added:

    Puck looked down...kneeling snugly between his legs, a coy smile on

25. tansanalopez reblogged this from puckpuckpuck and added:

    Any sudden flare up...being cut off right when she was about to hit jackpot

26. puckpuckpuck reblogged this from tansanalopez and added:

    head back against...arm rest lazily, Puck let out a deep throat moan at

27. tansanalopez reblogged this from puckpuckpuck and added:

    oh so carefully splayed...base, curling a finger entirely around

28. puckpuckpuck reblogged this from tansanalopez and added:

    Puck simply let her take charge, not...mood for an argument. When Santana was on top

29. tansanalopez reblogged this from puckpuckpuck and added:

    Santana smirked at...rhetorical question because, of course, it wasn’t even a question...

30. puckpuckpuck reblogged this from tansanalopez and added:

    instruction, digging deeper with his index finger all...knuckle. The moans escaping

31. tansanalopez reblogged this from puckpuckpuck and added:

    head lifted up and hitting...hard door behind her, snorting amusedly at

32. puckpuckpuck reblogged this from tansanalopez and added:

    Puck’s hands moved to hold the back of her thighs to keep her in place more securely, pressing

33. tansanalopez reblogged this from puckpuckpuck and added:

    wondering internally whether she hadn’t given...mental capacity enough credit, Santana...

34. puckpuckpuck reblogged this from tansanalopez and added:

    time to register what was happening before his back was slammed against...plump lips...

35. tansanalopez reblogged this from puckpuckpuck and added:

    Santana lingered...her room for a moment, waiting for

36. puckpuckpuck posted this